Lurching around in self-disgust is unnecessary futility. Do I comfort down and doss away/when can? Or, do what it takes, for a better tomorrow’s world? Better, in able to contribute somehow, in prayer and who knows how else? Oh, that’ll do.
'One thing I know, for he loves me so, Jesus blood ne’er fails me… Blood never fails me...’.
Gavin Bryars finds a tape of this, once known as a ‘tramp’ – and not a drinker, as happs.–singing in an alley. Might be one of the most powerful acts of sowing on audio-record. The looping version, reinforcing, what it’s all about. Dogged and triumphant declarations to God, and by a man, seemingly without quite the sheltered ease to distract-off and not-pray. Not sing, prayer-like.
Not likely as baggage-d up with other things. There's a literal to this, with his cart or bags. The cold but make-do. Somehow less, making for so much more. Them days maybe different (the 60's) but the streets and woods remain the place and need to be on a ready-made survival mission. And in this and God-seeking, space and maybe time, to be on the front-line for what really matters.
The worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things, come in and...
– y’can kiss goodbye to God work.
Jesus talking not 'why do what could' and if revelation-realise should – but ours to choose: This -or- that? IF, you… or..? Not bargaining but an offer. Never 'telling us to...' but rightly knows the direction we're heading. How we will-do and want more to, because one thing gets clearer with sin-ways, it's bereft of substance. Fun empty maybe, but empty. Tis for me anyway. And yet... need to roll way the stone. Not sit and watch it like some perpetual trap and roundabout. The inevitable.
Fitness and full-on, or... too-often shy away and move off from costing-up and persisting through?
Jordan P.'s running through my subconscious chatter; “Sacrifice and succeed, don’t, won’t”.
Therefore put these read-myself's up. Expressions to help marker, watch, see development. Not so much go back over but done in the day and a productive process. As I do the graph and write, be somehow reviving. Receiving. With enough of a public domain, includes knowing, ‘fessed up to the occasional viewer, in the anonymity and silence.
An image to see before me, front and centre. Hope and promise. Intended not-type today and wait for the morn. Be more able and lucid. But needed, or like to. Help me into communication with God as do. Type and talk, read and get verses-up – and sing, till it's on inner auto-play, “Jesus blood...”
The ‘dust’ even, is to be shaken-off, what we have no business remaining in. In this Jesus declaring the smallest something is no-good leaven in the mix. Can be the dust of thinking. Residue from incessant crimes and self-punishment. The dust is inevitable in contact with those who wouldn’t welcome me, be hospitable and yet, why am I approaching?
Last line/proclaim: Shake the dust off -or- be distracted by another here-comes-something and let it settle. Takes radical repetition; "Jesus blood never failed me...".